Thursday, October 28, 2010

The post that was written yesterday and posted today

I am actually pretty relieved that the few people I've invited to read my blog haven't, and so I'm still all to myself here in my cozy little blog able to speak as I please as its still just between me and well me.  So me, today was a beautiful day.  There was a lot of wind as result of yesterdays storms and that made the fall leaves even more magical for the little one which was nice.

Another day.  Although I am not employed and another day doesn't equal another dollar I have finally come to accept the fact today that I am ok with that as long as my little beauty is little and in my constant care.  I love being a Mom, but mostly because she is so amazing.  Worth every sleepless night and all the pain I have suffered.  Its not her fault that its so painful, and she is so amazingly patient with my faults and hard days.  She always cuddles it better, like she knows that I need it. I think she is perfect and I have decided that I might actually consider having another child once she is old enough to be in school and have most of her life be not needing me - probably in about 5 years.  I want another little miracle but I won't do it at the expense of my current miracle.  I feel strongly that every child should get the most attention, love and care possible and that Mother's with limitations like mine should embrace them and just enjoy the time they have with the offspring they are blessed with.  At least that's what I keep telling myself :)  Its not easy sometimes being so in love with being a Mom and so unable to have another child without costing the child you have dearly.

In answer to my post the other day, I have decided for now to pursue a Funeral Sciences degree.  I say for now because last couple of times I picked a degree to pursue I almost died shortly there after in very painful ways, and the aftermath of dying and pain normally does tend to change ones path a bit now doesn't it, at least it does mine.  On the upside I found that it is a associates degree I can pursue completely online except for a couple weeks on campus for restorative arts and embalming and also having to find a funeral director to teach me said skills before I go take said labs and vouch for teaching me before I get into the course, fun.  Here's hopen I don't almost die this time and can actually pursue a degree of higher education that would lead to actually being able to pursue my bachlors degree and also having a career I can do part time (I wouldn't own a funeral home rather my hope would be to contract to them to do the embalming and restoration and or work very part at a funeral home).  Enough about that though, just time to sit back and see if it all works out.

Sorry for missing yesterday, bad weather mixed with rambuncious child and throw in a migrain and you've got a hard day and that was my yesterday.  Don't think I am blaming it on the child, the migrain is actually a part of my body being broken, poor dear I'm just thankful she is so patient and loving.  Really I could not have asked for a better child, though one day with my health proplems resulting from said almost dying and my normally active 1 year old would cause anyone to question there sanity :)  Any takers?  A day in my shoes?  haha, no I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.  Which is why I wish that all the stupid people would have left me alone so that I wouldn't have the problems that I have.  Though, without some stupid people life would be much less amusing - seriously the things they say and do.  I guess this would be a great time to make a confession:

I am peopleist.  Peopleist = against stupid people.  I am not rasist in any faction as one could see by the people I have considered to be my closest friends when there paths walked through my life, I am peopleist.  Not that I am one who is against society, or organized religon, or any of the other things that you hear people say who are either stupid or starting to become anti-stupid but don't know how to express it - I am just against the stupid that make those things bad.  My thoughts have been on this more and more as I watch the stupidest people running for office. The fact that these special people can run for office just makes me even more grateful for the freedoms we have in this country, and flabbergasted that they can say that stuff without having any idea how stupid they sound and are.  Seriously people!!! sighs.  They just don't get that we can't blame our problems on any one group or people because every group and people has allot of wonderful wonderful people and I have had dear friends and acquaintances from most every major group out there, and through my life path have decided that the one universal thing that I am against is the stupid people as they cause allot of problems.  Not that stupid people mean to cause problems, they are just well stupid.

Despite my despising stupid people  I think that life is very beautiful and am very grateful to live in a country where people are free to show there stupidity and intellegence alike and that we do not hide behind a wall saying that we are perfect, rather we embrace our imperfections and allow people to take or leave what they want from the resulting lessons.   I just can't wait for politic season to end :)

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